Section 3: Develop Rapport & Connection Fast

10. Attractive Social Energy

Hi, so in this video here, I would like to talk to you about how you could have an attractive social energy because remember, words are only seven percent and 93 percent is the non-verbal.

It means that there is your voice, your eye contact, your body language.

And it’s really important to focus on the emotions that you feel.

Why?

Because if you feel confident, you will appear as confident and you will have a body language that will be confident if you are, for example, sad or depressed, your body language, your voice intonation, your eye contact will be according to what you are feeling.

So it’s really important if you want to become socially successful, to take care of how you feel.

Now, I’m not saying to be happy and to be positive all the time.

I’m not saying that if sometimes you are sad and depressed, it’s okay to be sad and depressed because we are human.

But what I want to say is that if most of the time when you approach people, you don’t take care of how you feel, then it will be difficult for you to be socially successful or you will be only attracting people who are negative and depressed.

So what I encourage you to do is to really take care of how you feel.

And the secret that I would like to share with you here is that most people never take care of how they feel.

They don’t basically people said:

Alan, I applied your advice in what to say, how to approach someone.

But people don’t like me.

I don’t know why.

And then when I see this person approaching, they are dead inside.

They have no emotion.

They are sad, depressed and : Alan.

I don’t understand why I don’t have social success.

It’s because the person is not feeling great for the secret I would like to share with you here is that before going to a social place, I would like you to listen to some music, to just put yourself in a great state and you will start by doing that.

And then I would like you to close your eyes for three seconds and just remember a positive memory, because if you remember a positive memory, you will be able to access these positive emotions.

So if you do that just before going to a social place, you are in your car, you are walking you at home, you just close your eyes.

And you remember a positive memory and you really feel these emotions in your body, you feel them, and then when you start feeling these emotions, you just expend them through your body.

And as you can see in doing that, and you can see already that my energy level has changed, you see the more powerful, more happy.

I’m happier and I have a better energy.

Now, just by doing that for a few seconds.

Now, what happens if now I go in, I approach people, I will become charismatic and magnetic.

So you can also do that.

You also have this power.

So I would like you to just do this exercise right now.

Just stand up.

And when you stand up, I would like you just to close your eyes for a few seconds.

And when you do that, I would like you to remember a happy memory and really feel the memory to immerse yourself, close your eyes and imagine the memory.

Who was there with you?

What did you feel were the only sounds?

Was there any smell?

What was there and you will try to relive the experience and then when you get this emotion of being happy and positive, I would like you to expand it.

And you do that.

You are doing that at home, I hope, or somewhere that you can really do this exercise first.

It can be difficult to access this emotion, but if you practice that over and over again, you will be able to do like me in a few seconds to just close your eyes and access this emotion really quickly.

So the more you practice is exercise, the easier it will be.

What you can also do is when you are interacting with someone.

Just for a few seconds, for a few seconds, you just focus on something great, something great that happened that day or something that you are grateful for.

In a few seconds and you will see that you will be able to really access this positive energy.

So to just show you an example.

Now I’m talking to you and I’m really being grateful.

So I’m thinking about great things that happened to me today.

You see that my energy is really positive and outgoing.

And I hope that you would like to interact with me right now.

But now, if I think about something really sad and about something that makes me depressed, you can see how my body language changes my tone of voice and you see how I’m talking a little bit slower.

And I don’t really know.

And I don’t really think that you would like to hang out with me right now.

And what has changed is just my social energy.

And you can see in a few seconds I’m able to recreate this social energy that is attractive.

How?

By just focusing on a memory that is happy.

So I would like you to practice and try to practice at home.

You go from one state of happiness to depressed, happiness, depressed, happiness, depressed.

And how do you do that?

You change your focus because that will give you the emotions that are inside you is what you focus on, to focus on something that is really positive.

And you will see that it will be easier for you to interact with people.

Also, something that I do and I encourage you to do is to practice gratitude daily.

So every day when you wake up, you take a piece of paper and a pen and you just write down what you are grateful for, what you are grateful for.

You have a roof, you have food, you have water.

You have people who love you.

You have that in your life.

You have that, that, that.

And then you really feel this emotion because the more you are used to feeling these great emotions of gratitude, happiness, the easier it will be to trigger them.

And then when you are in a social situation, you will be able just to think about the memory or about what you are grateful for and the emotion will enter your body.

So that was it for the social attractive energy.

Now, I just would like to share a concept that is a little bit more advanced that I use when I really need to make a first impression.

So it’s a little bit more advanced.

So if you don’t want to use it, that’s OK.

When I’m talking to someone, I would imagine that there is a bandwidth between us and I will imagine that there is a bandwidth and I would imagine that the bandwidth is opening.

So I will imagine a bandwidth that is like that.

And then I will put myself in a great state, feel great emotions, and then I will imagine that I’m throwing the positive energy at you.

And then what will happen as I have opened this bandwidth that I’m just imagining I am throwing these positive emotions, you will be able to feel them and then you would associate these positive emotions to me.

So it’s something that’s a little bit more advanced that you can do.

Again, you just imagine that there is a bandwidth between you two.

You open it and you are still imagining that in your mind and then you feel great.

You put yourself in state and then you throw the energy at them, the great energy.

OK, so this is more advanced.

Why?

Because you must be able to really access the state of happiness and being positive really, really quickly.

So that was it for the attractive energy practice entering this positive state.

And you will see that people will really love you and they won’t understand why, because everything is about energy and about the body language.

It’s about the 93 percent of the nonverbal.

下面是这些词汇在原笔记（Attractive Social Energy 主题）里的含义或对应的中文解释，结合了文中的上下文用法：

1. intonation
   • 含义：语调。
   • 在文中的语境：指你说话的高低起伏、情感投入等，会反映或传递你的情绪与态度。
2. charismatic
   • 含义：有魅力的，富有感召力的。
   • 在文中的语境：如果你情绪积极并展现自信、热情，你就会显得很有吸引力和个人魅力。
3. magnetic
   • 含义：像磁铁一样有吸引力的，富有“磁性”的。
   • 在文中的语境：当你散发正面能量，别人会自然被你吸引，想要和你多接触或聊天。
4. immerse
   • 含义：沉浸，投入其中。
   • 在文中的语境：当你回想某个快乐记忆时，要让自己完全“沉浸”在当时的场景和感觉里，以真正产生那种积极情绪。
5. relive
   • 含义：重新体验，回味；再一次感受过去的经历。
   • 在文中的语境：指通过回想或想象，再次体验曾经带给你正面情绪或快乐的记忆。
6. grateful
   • 含义：心怀感恩的、感到感谢的。
   • 在文中的语境：一种积极的情绪状态，通过记住自己所拥有的好事物来带动自己的正向能量。
7. outgoing
   • 含义：外向的、开朗的、积极与他人互动的。
   • 在文中的语境：处在积极情绪中时，你会表现得更“外向、开朗”，更容易与他人产生互动。
8. gratitude
   • 含义：感恩之情。
   • 在文中的语境：培养“感恩心态”可以让你更容易获得并保持正面情绪，并在社交中以更好的能量状态出现。
9. bandwidth
   • 含义：带宽；在此比喻“人与人之间的能量或情感连接通道”。
   • 在文中的语境：想象在你和对方之间存在一个可以传递正面情绪的“通道”，当你积极“传递”这些情绪时，对方会感受到。
10. state
    • 含义：心理或情感状态。
    • 在文中的语境：指你在社交场合中的情绪、能量层级等，比如“开心的状态”或“消极的状态”。

Takeaway

Key Takeaways – Attractive Social Energy

1. Nurture Positive Emotions
   • Because nonverbal cues (tone, posture, facial expressions) dominate communication, focus on how you feel before and during interactions.
   • If you enter a social situation feeling genuinely upbeat, you’ll naturally project confidence and warmth.
2. Use “Positive State” Exercises
   • Recall a Happy Memory: Close your eyes, relive a joyful experience, and let those emotions fill you.
   • Practice Shifting Moods: Alternate between a happy thought and a sad thought to learn how to quickly access a positive state in conversation.
3. Leverage Gratitude
   • Make gratitude a daily habit: jot down things you’re thankful for.
   • The more you train yourself to feel good, the easier it becomes to tap into those emotions on demand.
4. Advanced “Energy Bandwidth” Visualization (Optional)
   • Imagine a “bandwidth” or channel between you and the other person.
   • Feel your positive energy, then envision sending it to them through this channel.
   • This helps them sense (and associate you with) those upbeat vibes.

By focusing on genuine positivity—through memory, gratitude, or visualization exercises—you project an attractive social energy that draws people in and makes them enjoy your company.

以下是这些词汇在原文 takeaway（“Key Takeaways – Attractive Social Energy”）中的含义或中文解释，结合上下文为你解析：

1. Nurture
   • 含义：培育、培养。
   • 在文中的语境：指在社交时“培养”自己的积极情绪，让它逐步壮大并在互动中发挥作用。
2. cues
   • 含义：线索、信号、提示。
   • 在文中的语境：非语言沟通中的“线索”，如语调、姿势、面部表情等，会传递情绪和态度。
3. dominate
   • 含义：占主导地位，支配。
   • 在文中的语境：非语言线索在交流中比语言更具影响力，因而“主导”了人与人之间的沟通效果。
4. genuinely
   • 含义：真正地、由衷地。
   • 在文中的语境：强调用“真诚、实在的”态度或心情与他人互动，而不是假装或敷衍。
5. upbeat
   • 含义：乐观的、积极向上的。
   • 在文中的语境：形容人或者情绪状态充满正能量、愉悦感。
6. relive
   • 含义：重新体验、回味。
   • 在文中的语境：让自己再度“回味”一段快乐的记忆，从而触发当时的正面情绪。
7. joyful
   • 含义：高兴的、充满喜悦的。
   • 在文中的语境：形容能让人感到欢乐、幸福的一种情感或记忆。
8. Shifting
   • 含义：转变、切换。
   • 在文中的语境：在情绪练习中，从一种状态（如低落）切换到另一种状态（如快乐）。
9. state
   • 含义：状态；心境。
   • 在文中的语境：指一个人的情感或心理状况，比如“进入积极状态”。
10. Leverage
    • 含义：充分利用、巧妙地运用。
    • 在文中的语境：把“感恩”这样的练习方法当作工具来“发挥”更大的效果，让你能随时调动积极情绪。
11. Gratitude
    • 含义：感激、感恩之情。
    • 在文中的语境：每日写下自己感恩的事情，用来培养并巩固积极的心态。
12. jot down
    • 含义：快速记下、随手写下。
    • 在文中的语境：指把自己感到感激的事情迅速记录在纸上，作为日常练习。
13. tap into
    • 含义：利用、挖掘、激发（某种资源或潜能）。
    • 在文中的语境：学会“挖掘”积极情绪，快速调动快乐或感恩的情感。
14. Bandwidth
    • 含义：原本指带宽，这里比喻两人间可交流的“能量通道”或“连接”。
    • 在文中的语境：想象在你和对方之间存在一个“通道”，可以借此“传递”正面能量。
15. channel
    • 含义：渠道、途径、通道。
    • 在文中的语境：与“bandwidth”相似，指你向他人传递积极情绪的“路径”。
16. envision
    • 含义：想象、设想。
    • 在文中的语境：提醒你可以通过脑海中“想象”一个能量通道，帮助你将好情绪传递给对方。
17. sense
    • 含义：感受到、觉察到。
    • 在文中的语境：对方能“感应到”你释放的积极或友善的情绪。
18. upbeat (再次出现)
    • 与前文相同，强调积极、乐观、愉快的状态或氛围。
19. vibes
    • 含义：气场、氛围、感觉。
    • 在文中的语境：指你所散发出的“正面能量”，会在与人互动时影响对方的感受。
20. genuine
    • 含义：真诚的、真实的。
    • 在文中的语境：指你所传递的正面情绪一定要是出于真心，而不是虚伪或刻意伪装。
21. positivity
    • 含义：积极性、正面态度。
    • 在文中的语境：整体的积极心态，令人感到愉悦和充满能量。
22. project
    • 含义：投射、传递、展现。
    • 在文中的语境：你把所拥有的正面能量“展现在”别人面前，让他们感到你的魅力。
23. draws in
    • 含义：吸引、引来。
    • 在文中的语境：正面能量会“把别人吸引过来”，让他们愿意与你交往和交流。
24. company
    • 含义：陪伴、相处。
    • 在文中的语境：当你散发出正面、愉悦的气息时，别人会更想“待在你身边”。

中文摘要

如何打造具有吸引力的社交能量 – 中文要点总结

1. 培养正向情绪
   • 交流中非语言因素（如语调、肢体语言、面部表情）对整体印象起关键作用。
   • 在出门或与人交往前，先让自己进入愉快、自信的情绪状态。
2. 使用“积极情绪”训练
   • 回忆快乐经历：闭上眼睛，沉浸在一段能带来喜悦的回忆中，感受当时的声音、画面与心情。
   • 练习快速切换：在脑海中多次切换“快乐”与“低落”画面，练习迅速调动积极情绪的能力。
3. 善用感恩力量
   • 养成每日书写感恩清单的习惯，列出让你心怀感激的事物（家人、朋友、生活条件等）。
   • 长期持续后，能帮助你更轻松地保持积极心态，并随时“调动”这种情绪。
4. 可选进阶技巧：“能量带宽”可视化
   • 想象你与对方之间存在一条传递正面能量的“通道”。
   • 当你处于高能量、快乐的情绪状态时，透过这条“带宽”向对方“发送”积极感觉，让对方也能感受并将这快乐与好感投射回到你身上。

通过持续地关注并管理自己的情绪状态，并适度借助记忆和感恩练习，你就能在社交场合散发出令人想要接近的“磁场”，让别人自然地喜欢与你交流。

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